It's been a long time coming, but we've never felt more heard than ever.
In what seemed like a post-Valentine/post-Christmas present to all working Filipino mothers by the president, Republic Act #11210 otherwise known as The 105-day Expanded Maternity Leave Bill (EML) was finally signed into law last February 20, 2019. I rejoiced together with all the hardworking Filipino mothers and our collective triumph was sweet and resounding. Senator, fellow mom, and principal sponsor and author of the bill, Riza Hontiveros banners this accomplishment on her Facebook page saying this bill now puts us at par with the international standards of maternity leave policies. A lot of mothers due to give birth this March and April are now on the edge even more as we all await the final implementing rules and regulations (IRR) that will officially seal the deal and mandate our employers to comply. But apart from obviously being a moment of victory for working Filipino mommas, here's what it truly, truly means.
We were not imagining it at all when we realized how difficult post-partum recovery was.
If anything, the enactment of this bill is the loudest affirmation yet to how difficult and complicated post-partum recovery is for us mothers. Our birth stories are all different. Some of us labored for 30 mins and baby was out in 2 pushes, while some had to undergo 2 rounds of induction, a painful epidural, and an emergency CS after days of labor. But just the same, all of us had to go through an extreme physical, mental, and emotional healing process afterwards regardless of our birthing stories. This recovery process is especially difficult for new mothers like myself. Personally, it was the most overwhelming and exhausting process I ever had to endure my whole life—and I am not exaggerating.
RELATED: Motherhood is f*ck*ng hard.
Before this new law, mothers were only legally granted 60 days of maternity leave and fathers 7 days of paternity leave with pay. The new law now grants mothers 105 days or 3.5 months of paid maternity leave - 7 days of which are transferable to dads. When I gave birth to my first born, one of the first things I had to think about was how I could fit everything that I need to accomplish into 60 days before going back to work. Unlike other mommas who were blessed with more favorable circumstances and had the option to not work anymore after giving birth, quitting my job wasn't an option for my family. This meant I had to take care of the following things all at the same time before I returned to work after 60 days:
Recover from my painful CS wound
Learn how to understand my first-born's cues as a ftm (please note that I didn't have a yaya at this point)
Attend to all my baby's needs (exclusive breastfeeding, bathing, diaper changes, visits to the pedia, vaccine schedules, etc.)
Take care of the house (cleaning, laundry, food, grocery, minor repairs, etc.)
Take care of the dogs (who are much like toddlers)
Calm myself when I get too emotional or overwhelmed
Take care of other members of the family whenever the need arises
Make necessary preparations for my return to work
Look for a reliable stay-in nanny to take care of my baby while I'm at work (we all know how difficult this is, can I get an Amen)
Remind myself that I need to keep it together for my baby and family whenever I feel like I'm on the verge of losing my sanity
All of this in 60 days. It was too much for me to process and go through. I had to cry to my husband several times just to release all those emotions because otherwise I might have gone completely nuts. The EML is like an acknowledgement that at some point in that crazy 60-day recovery mess, someone actually heard my prayer and promised that the next time this happens, I won't have to struggle under the same intense pressure. And that I can just focus on healing physically, mentally, and emotionally. And that I can spend most of that time to bask in the joy of having a new born, listen intently to his/her needs, and just concentrate on being a well and healthy mother.
Motherhood isn't a vacation that you file and get over with after 60 days.
Apart from being an affirmation of the fact that post-partum recovery is in fact a difficult process, EML is also a nod to the fact that giving birth is not in any way a vacation, or an inconvenience that you have to file a leave for that you can also get over with after a certain amount of time. NO. Making it legal for mothers to take a break from work for 105 days (with pay) means the government is acknowledging the fact that motherhood is not something you can limit in the benefit of business results. This is like the government telling us that "yes, we respect that motherhood is a natural process of life, and we understand how much time you need to recuperate and provide your newborns all their needs to ensure they achieve optimal health and well being within the first crucial months of their lives." Part of the bill also states that businesses should not discriminate against women when it comes to employment, and should continue to provide equal opportunities, benefits, and compensation between men and women. I personally think discrimination is a very messy business to tackle and getting rid of it totally in the corporate world is a near impossible feat to accomplish. However, the EML is like the government putting its foot down and making it clear that mothers have a legal basis for calling out discriminating employers. It honestly feels like this law is reassuring us "I got your back, momma."
Our babies don't have to grow up too fast.
Having only 60 days of maternity leave honestly feels like I need to make sure my baby learns to be independent enough to be able to survive in the care of somebody else before I head back to work. Apart from being independent, I also felt pressured to make sure my baby adapts well to bottle-feeding within 60 days, and quite honestly it wasn't an easy feat and it didn't feel natural. I also dedicated myself to exclusively breastfeeding my son for as long as I could. This meant that it was crucial for my baby to learn how to feed from the bottle, and as we all know, it's difficult for babies to learn how to do this if they also latch on mommy directly. I could not take it in me to not allow him to latch for the sake of teaching him how to drink milk from the bottle. So, having only 60 days to do this was a really painful pressure for me and my baby. It was as if I had to force him to grow up a little bit faster. The EML means having more time to, at least, gradually adapt to the changes our family will need to face. It means my baby and I have more time to prepare ourselves and learn all the things we need so we're both able to adapt well to being apart once I need to go back to work. It means we won't need to rush as much, and my baby can be a baby for a bit more time.
"Now, mothers will have more time to rest from pregnancy. Children will be better fed. Fathers and caregivers can bond and create more lasting memories with their loved ones, as families everywhere receive the greatest gift of all time." Sen. Riza Hontiveros
The love we have for our children is endless; so undying that we're ready to make that sacrifice of being away from them - in all their littleness and frailty - for a couple of hours a day just so we could ensure a promising future for them. The Expanded Maternity Leave to me is both an ode to the nobility of motherhood and an encouragement for us working mothers to continue raising healthy and well-loved children, to never stop dreaming about a better future, and to keep on working hard for our families.
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