I know it's scary but listen up, roll up your sleeves, and let's have this one covered.
This one's a personally difficult topic to write about. I know I've probably made the words anxious and terrified redundant in the article title, but if that's any indication of how exactly scared I am, I'll leave it as that. After 18 months of living life as a first-time mother, I still could not find it in myself to be tough at the thought of experiencing a natural calamity or disaster with my 1 and a half-year-old baby and 3 dogs. I understand that fear is like second nature to mothers, but to someone who's had to beat anxiety on a daily basis, the idea becomes even more terrifying by 10 folds.
After the recent 6.2 magnitude earthquake here in Manila, my most important takeaway from it was the fact of how utterly unprepared my family is. If you're battling serious anxiety like me, the first thing you need to acknowledge is that most of the fear comes from not knowing. Being uncertain about what to do during a natural calamity gives off the feeling that we're not in control. To be honest, we're really not in control during acts of God, but as parents, we can do some things to ensure our family's safety - and that gives us at least a semblance of power over fear. I know it freaks the hell out of you, but listen up, here's how we do it.
1. Don't delay it. Have that conversation with your partner now then relay the strategy with the rest of the family.
Ever since news about the Big One started circulating some 2 years ago, me and my husband already started having minor discussions about what we should do. They were minor discussions because we were never really able to come up with concrete strategies then. Last week's earthquake was a cold wake-up call for us. If we're not gonna have this conversation now, we still won't know what to do when the next earthquake hits - and who knows when that is and how strong it's gonna be. So no matter how uncomfortable a topic this is if you're highly anxious like me, know that having this conversation will not only put your mind at ease but will also give your entire family some sense of security.
Sit down, prepare a pen and paper and identify the following:
Which parts of the house are vulnerable during an earthquake? You may also want to consult your contractor or someone more expert on the matter if you're unsure. Identify these parts and make sure the entire household understands these should be avoided while the ground is shaking.
During an earthquake, where is it safest to hide under? While it's been generally recommended to hide under tables, identify other furniture in the house that may be unstable and cross that out from your hiding spot options.
Assign a meeting place for the entire family once it's safe to evacuate. Do you have other relatives nearby? Coordinate your evacuation strategies and agree to meet up at one safe place.
If you're pregnant, identify other possible places to have your baby in case you cannot get to the hospital or birthing center of your choice. If you are close to your due date, talk to your health care provider about what to do in case of an emergency (Get Ready | American Public Health Association).
Do you have pets? Assign a person-in-charge for your furchildren and determine whether you'll carry them, use a harness, a trolley, a stroller, or their regular leash during evacuation.
Identify how many pack-and-go bags you can realistically carry with you during evacuation. Designate each pack to a person so you're assured nothing will be left behind.
In case you and your husband are out of the house (in the office, for example) when the earthquake hits, who's going to be responsible for your baby? Do you have a secondary assigned person just in case the assigned individual becomes injured or unable to care for your baby? Do they know your evacuation protocol?
2. Do a grocery and handy-man shop run now and complete your go-bag items.
Get some sturdy, waterproof backpacks ready and complete your survival kit ASAP. The following images contain a list of survival items (excluding baby necessities - separate list below) according to Martin Aguda, a Disaster Risk Reduction and Emergency Management Advocate as cited by CNN Philippines.
The survival kit list above applies to general, non-infant members of the family. The little ones, however, will require a more specific list. See list below from the US Centers for Disease Control & Prevention (CDC)
Evacuation Kit for Baby
A well-stocked diaper bag (at least one pack of diapers, at least two packs of baby wipes, baby powder, diaper rash cream, baby wash and lotion, and re-sealable plastic bags (gallon size) for stashing dirty diapers and clothes)
Powdered infant formula (at least 48 scoops worth for both breastfeeding and non-breastfeeding moms)
2-5 baby bottles and nipples or 2-3 sippy cups
1-2 boxes of nursing pads (if disposable, reusable will require laundry and bleach daily)
Burp rags or smaller blanket
Pacifiers, if they use them (at least two)
Teething tablets or gel
The default must-have medicines (paracetamol, nasal decongestant, antihistamine, etc.) plus other required supplement or medication
Bulb syringe and portable nebulizer
Toddler snacks
Extra clothes
Extra emergency blankets (at least two)
Receiving blankets (at least two)
Thermos
Small camp stove for boiling water for sanitizing
And, let's not forget about our furchildren. Just like our human babies, they also need a separate kit for themselves as detailed in this list - still - from US CDC.
Evacuation Kit for Pets
Water (3-day supply per pet)
Pet food (3-day supply)
Food/water bowls
Medical records
Two-week supply of medicines (if any)
Pet first aid kit
Cat litter, newspaper or paper toweling
Puppy pads
Disposable bags for clean up
Recent photos of your pets (in case you are separated and need to make āLostā posters)
Toys and/or treats
Blanket
Extra collar with name tag and contact information
Extra leash
3. Ensure that your emergency/evacuation plan is well-communicated to all members of the family.
Our current challenge is making sure our baby's yaya understands all the specific details of our emergency plan as clearly as possible. She's 52 years old and requires constant reminding, but she nonetheless exhibits presence of mind when needed. Members of our family are also on different levels in taking this matter seriously, but we try to emphasize that regardless if this happens anytime soon or in the far future, this is something we all need to absorb right now whether we like it or not.
As mentioned earlier, assign each member to a bag, carry-on, or pet. Basically anything that needs to be carried out the door must be properly assigned to a certain individual.
Communicate the details of the strategy you've discussed with your husband in item #1 to the family. Make sure everybody's aligned at where you'll all meet during evacuation, what everybody should do (duck, cover, and hold) during an earthquake, and where everybody should seek temporary cover in the house while the ground is shaking.
Print multiple copies of emergency contact numbers and distribute this among all members of the household. Post a copy on your fridge too or anywhere that's easy for all members to see in case of an emergency.
Ask any member to cascade first aid and CPR training basics to the rest of family. While you have the time, it's a good idea to invest and register to these trainings too.
4. Lastly, you need to bank on your calmness and sanity.
The bottom line of all this is, when push comes to shove, your family will have to rely on your sanity and calmness in times of disaster. This is a caveat to that imaginary contract we signed up for as mothers: that no matter what happens, no matter how much more anxious you are than the rest of the family, you need to be one - if the not the most - level-headed person in times of emergency. This means that while the fear of the unknown blows our freaking minds and sets off that internal alarm, all this noise needs to be silenced and you need to find your balance and calm amidst all of itāwhatever it takes. Your baby needs you to be his or her safe place. Your husband, and probably all the rest of the family, does too. Let this be a reminder that most of that anxiety comes from not knowing what will happen. And while we will never know that for sure, we can at least hold on to the fact that there is something we can do to have that sense confidence that we've done something to prepare our family for whatever that could happen.
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